


Starksgiving in Winterfell

by escailyy



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Awkward Romance, Everyone is Part of the Pack, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Meeting the Parents, Modern Westeros, Thanksgiving Dinner
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-23
Updated: 2017-11-23
Packaged: 2019-02-06 01:22:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12806511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/escailyy/pseuds/escailyy
Summary: To put it simply, family was family and guest right was a Northern tradition, so everyone the elder Starks considered part of their clan had taken the excuse of Thanksgiving Guest right to introduce their significant others to Ned and Catelyn, mainly because it was the one night nobody could murder anybody else at the dinner table.





	Starksgiving in Winterfell

__

It was a bizarre Holiday in the North when the crippled son in the polyamory relationship actually started to look like their mother's favorite because next to the rest of them, Bran sitting in Meera's lap while holding Jojen's hand didn't even register in Catelyn's 'outrageous' scale.

That's how awkward Thanksgiving was.

To put it simply, family was family and guest right was a Northern tradition, so everyone the elder Starks considered part of their clan had taken the excuse of Thanksgiving Guest right to introduce their significant others to Ned and Catelyn, mainly because it was the one night nobody could murder anybody else at the dinner table.

So far there were two Lannisters, a Targaryen, one Frey, a wildling and the lovechild of Robert Baratheon....

On a scale of one to ten, Gendry, unsurprisingly, was winning the popularity contest.

"They like you!" Arya smiled proudly squeezing Gendry's bicep "I knew mom and dad would love you, but it's nice to have it confirmed, I won't need to threaten anybody with bodily harm now"

"Your dad offered me a job closer to Winterfell do you think I should take it?" Gendry looked as happy as Arya, in this rag tag group of people it was nice to know he was considered the lesser of all evils "I mean fleabottom gave me my roots but you know me, where you go I go"

"Winterfell? With Jory and dad's goons patrolling 24/7" Arya snorted "I would rather move to King's Landing, maybe take up that internship Illirio offered me, no need for you to bend to my dad's orders"

"Aww does this mean you're my girlfriend now?" Gendry grinned earning himself a swat in the head from Arya

"Shut up Gendry" Arya snorted then she looked at the imp sitting on her left "Hanging in there professor Tyrion?"

"Absolutely" Tyrion nodded to Arya before turning to his right "Your father looks like he's on the verge of having a stroke" Tyrion whispered to Sansa from his seat next to her "please tell me he doesn't have heart problems"

"After today he might develop some" Sansa replied in the same hush tone "but didn't worry, he'll adore you once he gets to know you"

"Before or after your mother murders me?"

Sansa actually paused to think about it "just don't leave my side for the rest of the night and she won't have a chance to get you alone"

Tyrion replied something that sounded vaguely like "Thank seven your aunt Lysa isn't here"

Across from them Danny sent Tyrion a Targaryen glare "If we get out of here alive Jon, I swear I will burn you for talking me into this" Danny hissed picking her fork up "Your aunt is glaring daggers at me and Tyrion was supposed to bail me out, instead I find out he's here too"

"She glares daggers at everyone, don't take it personally, my uncle seems to like you" Jon tried to reason with the love of his life "Also you're not the only one who's wondering what's up with Tyrion and Sansa, I'm feeling so betrayed"

"Your uncle just asked me if unionizing the Unsullied was my idea!" Danny grumbled squeezing Jon's hand angrily "What Masters.ltd was doing with them was slavery, of course unionizing them was the least I could do"

"At least mom hasn't brought up your exes yet" Robb advised passing the sliced boar to Jon and the peas to Danny "she did with us"

"Yes, I know I'm not a successful Surgeon in Afghanistan but Mrs Stark signing Talisa praises as soon as she saw me was the worst" a jaded Roslin agreed sending Danny a sympathetic look "Thanksgiving with Roose and Walda would have been less painful... even accounting for Ramsey"

"Relax, Aunt Catelyn is just mad that Robb dumped Talisa and stole Roslin from uncle Edmure" Jon snorted refilling Danny's glass "nothing some ass kissing from Robb won't cure"

"Wait really you dated his uncle?" Danny perked up with a new appreciation for her boyfriend's family

"He's a hot Uncle" Sansa, Arya and Bran chimed in from across the table

"Who's a hot Uncle?" Catelyn snapped momentarily diverted away from her conversation with Sam and Gilly.

"Uncle Benjen" Robb and Jon replied at the same time sounding eerily like the younger wolves.

Pacified Catelyn muttered a 'cant argue with that' and turned back to discussing Sam's plans to legally recognize Gilly's son as his.

"When in doubt, blame it on the lone ranger" Tyrion raised his cup to Jon, On Danny's quizzical look he rolled his eyes "You haven't met Benjen ok, he's like a male Lyanna Stark, all northern attraction with none of Ned's calories"

"I would do him" Meera agreed

"Who wouldn't" Tyrion muttered before Sansa kicked his chair under the table "I mean..." Tyrion coughed "No Sansa I don't envy Bran or his luck with dating two people of the same family"

"And you better stay that way" Sansa ordered with mock seriousness

From his seat next to their mother little Rickonn took a picture of Tyrion's puppy face and sent it to Arya with the caption "#totallyWhipped" which made Gendry snicker when he saw it

"It's all right we all know some Lannisters have weird family proclivities..." Robb side eyed Jamie who was blissfully pretending to not be hearing the conversation while feeding Brienne some cake and looking at her like if she was his personal Azor Ahai "How in the world did THAT one get tangled up with the Queen Bitch? Twincest aside, your brother is a big softie"

Tyrion sighed, well at least he hadn't been the one to say it "Honestly his therapist said he has deeply rooted masochist tendencies that makes him feel attracted to blond women who can't wait to beat him up" he clarified after a brief hesitation "apparently it's some subconscious mommy issues"

The whole table went "Ohhh" and a few "I knew it" were directed to Jamie, who now was trying and failing to get a blushing Brienne to hold his hand above the table and in plain view of the Stark matriarch

"I can't even watch" Tyrion shook his head "have you ever seen a Lannister more besotted?"

"I have" Danny snorts raising a mocking eyebrow at him making Sansa blush.

Next to Brienne, Jamie discreetly rolled his eyes "Wench this is the first time someone has ever roped me into a party just to make Tyrion look good in comparison" he whispered eying Catelyn Stark, who was per usual sniffing disappointedly whenever she looked at him "usually it's the other way around"

"If I had known that was the plan" Brienne said back "I wouldn't have asked you to come, I expected this type of subterfuge from Arya, but SANSA?" The Amazon glared at Jamie "Your brother is a terrible influence on her"

"Hey, don't start blaming Tyrion, I'll have you know that before this, my brother never, ever, crossed that line with a student and he's had prettier girls than Sansa try to get into his pants" Jamie returned Brienne's glare "Your saintly princess probably seduced Tyrion with Stark magic, using the direwolf superpowers that made Raegar screw the country for Lyanna"

"Heard that" Jon muttered rolling his eyes as he always did whenever anybody implied that his mother had been some kind of super seductress "Still don't believe it"

Brienne ignored Jon and was about to retort something when Ned Stark cleared his throat and decided to put the subject of her conversation in the hotspot.

"So Tyrion, what are your intentions towards my daughter?"

Every single sound in the table died and Sansa's grip on the imp's hand tightened when all eyes swung to Tyrion and her.

But Tyrion pretended that he wasn't totally intimidated by Ned (being a Lannister had it's uses when it came to faking bravado) "My intentions are only to make her happy, Sansa is the most wonderful person I've ever met"

"Yes she is and as such she should be treated with care and respect don't you think?" Ned agreed narrowing his eyes

"The highest respect" Tyrion resisted the urge to pull the collar of his shirt, did Sansa's dad know about the times he slept over at her condo? Did Catelyn?

"Tell me about your job? I heard your profession doesn't pay as much as it used to in this recession" Ned continued lazily, serving himself more turkey.

Somebody (Roslin) started to cough what appeared to be a very large bone while trying to hide her laughter, Robb sympathetically patted her back under the glaring eyes of his mother while secretly hiding his own smile.

"Which is why I'm planning on retiring from KL.U after this semester and giving my full attention to my position in Targaryen Corporations, we really think that we can do some good in Westeros now that Higharden Grain and Dorne Weaponry are offering Daenerys their sponsorship" Tyrion tried directing the conversation into a topic he was good with.

Sansa and Danny gave Tyrion a look that said 'really?' to which the imp nodded "That sounds great let me know when we can propose a partnership between the Wildling foundations, Tormund would love to hear from you" Jon like always was one step ahead but his aunt and uncle were like dogs with a bone

"No talking business at the table Jon" Catelyn chided sweetly passing the pumpkin bread

Ned wasn't deterred "Speaking from experience a job that earns that kind of gold that requires the average man to spend a lot of time away from their loved ones, what did you say you were planning to do about that again?"

Was there no winning with this man? First he implied Tyrion didn't make enough money to support Sansa, then he was spending too much time caring about money? "Targaryen Corporations is a big operation Mr Stark, I assure you that delegating is not hard when you work with a team like ours" he raised his glass to Danny "That one there is the best judge of character I know"

"What can I say, I want the best results so I hire the best people" Daenerys agreed

"But Sansa is still young, I don't suppose you can keep up with the pace of a university student all the time can you Tyrion?" Catelyn commented smiling at her daughter indulgently "She still has so much of life to explore"

"On the contrary I think Sansa is one of the few young people I know who is clear about who she wants to be and where she wants her future to go" Tyrion felt the need to clarify in Sansa's behalf "I'm just lucky enough to be part of that journey"

"And I'm lucky enough to have someone smart and witty to share it with" Sansa said warmly not even bothering to hide how happy his words made her.

And then because Tyrion was a little shit under pressure he thought up the first diversion tactic he could think of before the Starks could grill him more and threw Jamie under the bus "BRIENNE, JAMIE IS PLANNING TO PROPOSE" he burst out which effectively cut off Ned and Catelyn train of thought

"He's what!?" Brienne and (unsurprisingly) Catelyn Stark gasped at the same time

Seeing that Tyrion's tactic was working Sansa hurried up to add "Lannister gold with a sapphire... I've seen him practice his speech a couple of times when I pick up Tyrion from Jamie's penthouse"

"You pair of cunts! I was planning to make it special" Jamie groaned "you just ruined my life"

"Relax Kingslayer, She's going to say yes, it's not like Brienne is not totally in love with you or something" Arya snorted then reconsidered when Brienne suddenly went red and Jamie's sad face turned into a gleeful smile "oh shit you didn't know"

"No he didn't! Hell "I" didn't even know until two weeks ago, thank you Arya" Brienne muttered blushing furiously and then because she'd reached her breaking point she took a page out of the Lannister book and turned to Tyrion "Sansa has a a secret collection of Ewok plushies that she keeps in her bedroom because they all remind her of you"

Tyrion choked on his wine "wait what? Sansa is that why you said it was okay if I didn't shave?"

"Nooo, I swear, ok well, maybe a little" Sansa reminded herself why sharing a condo with Brienne and Arya was the worst idea ever when things like this happened, so out of embarrassment she turned to her sister's boyfriend "Gendry, that Thor shirt you love so much and you haven't found for weeks? You didn't really lose it, Arya stole it from Tobho Mott and uses it to sleep all the time, so saying Bri loves Jamie is like pot meeting kettle"

Gendry's face went from quizzical to lovesick in five seconds flat "Aw, Arry you do like to see me shirtless, I knew that's why all my shirts started disappearing"

"I don't! And that was private Sansa!" Arya snapped defensively, looking for her own target ( hopefully someone who didn't have dirt on her) and finding it in Robb who really had no business laughing the way he was "Roslin, old Walder didn't have a flat tire on my dad's last name day, he was just to embarrassed to show up with a black eye after Robb punched him bloody for calling you a useless ho"

"Maester Tam told me father had to go to the hospital for internal bleeding, I can't believe it was you" Roslin groaned bringing her hands to her face "that explains why Fat Walda is the only one who will talk to me these days"

"He deserved it and I don't regret it" Robb pouted unapologetically "besides it's nothing compared to what Jon did to Daario Naharis last week, at least I didn't humiliate someone on national TV out of pure unadultered jealousy" and That's when Robb heard Danny break her wine glass

"You said it was a friendly duel on TV Jon, you said that it was all for charity! I knew it was a dick measuring contest goddamit, I should have said no when Daario goaded you into it" Daenerys said mortified, looking apologetically at Ned and Catelyn "I told him it was wrong to use his longsword"

Jon who 'just came out to have fun and was now feeling so attacked' really didn't know how Thanksgiving had gotten so out of hand but he knew who's fault it was so he glared at Tyrion "Sansa, Tyrion writes sappy songs about you all the time and plays it in his place when you're not around, it's really sappy, terribly tooth rotting music that would hurt a self respecting male's ears...In case you're wondering why I don't crash at his place anymore"

Sansa's face lit up "Tyrion you can sing...?"

"No way, no, I'm not doing it"

Meanwhile Ned and Catelyn exchanged tired glances as the bickering continued "Where did I go wrong in raising them?" Catelyn muttered taking a sip of wine

"Let them be Cat, this is the most entertaining family get together we've had in ages" Ned chuckled thanking the seven for his wonderful family.

Yes this was what Thanksgiving was all about, family, honesty and all the love that could be shared....Even if his family was one mashed potatoes away from starting a food fight over Cat's good China.


End file.
